The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
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