maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
