I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Are my feet made of real feet?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
