If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
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