the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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