So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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