So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
