i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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