We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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