I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
