girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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