she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
