so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
