I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
