Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.