i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
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I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
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I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.