i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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