is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Randomize
