Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
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