They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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