I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize