Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Randomize