I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
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