so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
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I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
We have started to decorate penises.
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I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
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