I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
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And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
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Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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