I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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