The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
