I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
