Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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