i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
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I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
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I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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