I just made out with a guy for $7.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Randomize
