Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
