Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
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