left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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