porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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