i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
