It's like God shit irony all over that family
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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