im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
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