I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
You did what with his pubic hair?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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