I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
