Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Shame - the story of my life.
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