it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
two words...techno handjob
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
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