I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
