We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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