wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
