after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
What a dumb baby whore.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
