ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize