if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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