ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
