his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
We need to get me chipped asap
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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