I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
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